Christopher Michael Costello

from Glass, the Wall's Ghost III by Eric Beeny

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lyrics

I found a friend, my friend—
lying on the floor of his apartment.
Pounded on the door, called his cell phone—
he didn't answer.
His car was parked outside—
I was afraid to know why.
Borrowed a ladder from the guy next door,
climbed up to his window.
What I expected to find, I don't know...

No one had heard from him in almost a week.
Three weeks ago, he and I went out to eat
and just talked instead of going to see a movie.
And we all lose touch, for a while,
go on with our lives—
at least a short time, until we...

Trying to understand what it meant...
Called 911, called Nate,
gave the detective a statement,
went home and climbed into bed.
Dreamt I was back at his apartment,
he was still lying there...
He sat up and smiled and said,
"I was only joking, I swear..."

Christopher Michael Costello...
You were fine just three weeks ago...
Christopher Michael Costello...
We said goodbye and we both went home...

I found a friend, my friend—
lying on the floor of his apartment.
For the rest of my life, I'll live with your death...
The coroner said it was probably just an accident:
maybe the pain patch you wore, plus the pills
and, on top of it all, you started drinking again...
I keep wondering what it meant,
what it means to be alive at all
if you can just go off and die with no one knowing
until you don't answer their phone calls...
You were there about a week,
and we'll never speak again.
One of the last things we talked about was death...

Trying to think of anything to feel better...
My daughter was conceived
in the house you once owned on Oxford Ave.
where, long ago, you and I lived together...
Why'd it have to be you?
Why'd it have to be me who found you?
Why does it have to be anyone at all?
Just answer the phone call...

Eventually, someone finds us all...

Christopher Michael Costello...
You'll be missed, but you'll never know...
Christopher Michael Costello...
You were loved and, still, you died alone...
Christopher Michael Costello...

credits

from Glass, the Wall's Ghost III, released December 17, 2017

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Eric Beeny Buffalo, New York

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